A very Hygge Christmas!

We are social creatures, and the importance of this is clearly seen when one compares the satisfaction people feel in relationships with their overall satisfaction with life. The most important social relationships are close relationships in which you experience things together with others, and experience being understood; where you share thoughts and feelings, and both give and receive support. In one word: hygge.

Meik Wiking

I was chatting with a Danish friend in Second life the other day, someone I’ve known for many years, we were talking about the pandemic, (again!) but in a very positive light, we were talking about the fact that whilst Christmas and New Year had been very different, there was still much to love about it, the opportunity to spend quality time with immediate family, the fact the shops were closed which meant we’d stayed in doors more than normal, the fact we’d been able to just switch off, read, write, watch TV, the fact we had roofs over our heads and we were warm and safe, the fact we still exchanged gifts and love and the fact we had a little bit of snow, (she’d had lots!), all added to what was a lovely Christmas given the circumstances. She said, “it was a very Hygge Christmas!”

Yes, I said the same thing, what on earth was a Hygge Christmas?? Turns out those crafty little Danes have been keeping a bit of a lifestyle secret. I asked her to explain, in fairness, having read a little about it I understand why. My friend recommended a couple of books that might help explain a little more about the concept.

One of the books I’ve looked at, The Little Book of Hygge: The Danish Way to Live Well by Meik Wiking, which can be found here, gives a lovely introduction so, at the risk of committing plagiarism, I’m going to share it with you;

Hooga? Hhyooguh? Heurgh? It is not important how you choose to pronounce or even spell ‘hygge’. To paraphrase one of the greatest philosophers of our time – Winnie-the-Pooh – when asked how to spell a certain emotion, ‘You don’t spell it, you feel it.’ However, spelling and pronouncing ‘hygge’ is the easy part. Explaining exactly what it is, that’s the tricky part. Hygge has been called everything from ‘the art of creating intimacy’, ‘cosiness of the soul’ and ‘the absence of annoyance’ to ‘taking pleasure from the presence of soothing things’, ‘cosy togetherness’ and, my personal favourite, ‘cocoa by candlelight’. Hygge is about an atmosphere and an experience, rather than about things. It is about being with the people we love. A feeling of home. A feeling that we are safe, that we are shielded from the world and allow ourselves to let our guard down. You may be having an endless conversation about the small or big things in life – or just be comfortable in each other’s silent company – or simply just be by yourself enjoying a cup of tea. One December just before Christmas, I was spending the weekend with some friends at an old cabin. The shortest day of the year was brightened by the blanket of snow covering the surrounding landscape. When the sun set, around four in the afternoon, we would not see it again for seventeen hours, and we headed inside to get the fire going.

We were all tired after hiking and were half asleep, sitting in a semicircle around the fireplace in the cabin, wearing big jumpers and woollen socks. The only sounds you could hear were the stew boiling, the sparks from the fireplace and someone having a sip of their mulled wine. Then one of my friends broke the silence. ‘Could this be any more hygge?’ he asked rhetorically. ‘Yes,’ one of the girls said after a moment. ‘If there was a storm raging outside.’ We all nodded.

After reading the introduction, I thought back to the conversation I’d had with my Scandi friend. The penny didn’t so much as drop, more eased into the dropping position, I kinda got it, it’s not an adjective, it’s a feeling, a warm and glowing feeling with hints of euphoria.

In 2016, the Oxford dictionary, as they always do, shortlisted their word of the year, ultimately the winner was “Post-truth”, (even if you put a hyphen in there Oxford, I still think you’ll find it’s actually two words – just saying!), however, the word “Hygge” made it to the short list. The New Yorker magazine picked this up and ran an article you can find here; The article references The Little Book of Hygge and goes onto to provide a fabulous attempt in trying to nail down the concept. They reference another book written by the British journalist, Hellen Russel called; A year of living Danishly. You know me, I love a book with a quirky title so down it came to my kindle! Whilst Meik Wiking’s book is fabulous and for me a must read, Helen’s book is more a story, a story that walks you though the lifestyle implications on a day to day basis, (buy them both!!).

The New Yorker goes on to try to summarise Hygge in a few paragraphs;

Winter is the most hygge time of year. It is candles, nubby woollens, shearling slippers, woven textiles, pastries, blond wood, sheepskin rugs, lattes with milk-foam hearts, and a warm fireplace. Hygge can be used as a noun, adjective, verb, or compound noun, like hyggebukser, otherwise known as that shlubby pair of pants you would never wear in public but secretly treasure. Hygge can be found in a bakery and in the dry heat of a sauna in winter, surrounded by your naked neighbours. (Whilst wonderful people the New Yorker has never met my neighbours!) It’s wholesome and nourishing, like porridge; Danish doctors recommend “tea and hygge” as a cure for the common cold. It’s possible to hygge alone, wrapped in a flannel blanket with a cup of tea, but the true expression of hygge is joining with loved ones in a relaxed and intimate atmosphere.

"Joining with loved ones in a relaxed and intimate atmosphere", great line from the New Yorker and fair play for attempting to explain the concept of Hygge! Back to Christmas and New Year again, with all the madness I’ve seen and worked with over the last ten or so months and despite having to work through most of Christmas and New Year, I did have some seriously important, meaningful and beautiful moments that right now mean the earth to me! So, I can confirm, it was a very Hygge Christmas 😊

What’s on this week?