OMGYes!!

I hate society’s notion that there is something wrong with sex. Something wrong with a woman who loves sex.

Alessandra Torre

I love writing this blog, I love to try to find inspiration in an eclectic mix of subjects however, the thing I get most comments and feedback about are the blogs I post relative to sexuality and sexual health. Isn't it fabulous that we can now finally talk about stuff like this?! Finally, we're breaking down the social taboos that, for far to long have frowned upon any suggestion we might actually be having and enjoying a great sex life, equally it's now becoming increasingly acceptable to acknowledge that things in the bedroom, (or the kitchen, livingroom, bathroom for that matter!), are not quite as earth shattering as they could be!

One of the websites that have inspired me to explore and address social taboos is OMGYes. OMGYes aims to educate its female users to create more fulfilling, more enjoyable orgasms. It uses sexual pleasure research to reinforce and educate the techniques, which focus on 12 key methods, including “edging”, “rhythm”, “multiples” and “staging”.

Got your attention? Good! In fact it's got the attention of some very high profile members of the glitterati, Emma Watson recently announced she was a fully paid-up subscriber. But what makes OMGYes unique is its explicit, educational content, which includes videos of diverse volunteers demonstrating different methods on themselves, as well as a touch-screen tutorial where users can practice and improve their own technique. Given the number of videos online that portray female masturbation as a turn-on for straight male titillation, there is something fabulously refreshing and really quite remarkable about seeing the same content reinterpreted for women’s own empowerment and pleasure!

The vids are simple and straightforward, demonstrations rather than screaming orgasms, which seems a bit strange and clinical at first however, you soon realise that this only feels odd because we are so unused to seeing women talking frankly and naturally about their desires and bodies, instead of performing a stereotypical, panting response to massage a male ego. As Lydia Daniller, co-founder of OMGYes, points out: “It’s pretty clear to anyone who goes to the site that it’s a poor substitute for porn if that’s what you’re looking for. It’s much more like sitting and talking with close friends.”

What is most exciting about the website is that it is characteristic of the move towards a more frank and open discussion of female sexuality. We have discussed, joked about, portrayed on film and openly accepted male sexual urges for ages, there has long been a double standard preventing similar openness about women’s sexuality. This refreshing move towards a more pragmatic and transparent discussion of such matters is now happening more widely, perhaps fuelled in part by the frankness of social media, where activists have battled for the right to portray and discuss other taboo topics, such as menstruation, without censorship. Thanks to sites like OMGYes, mainstream media outlets are rapidly catching on, last year, Teen Vogue ran an article on its website with masturbation advice from young women, love it!

The site does a brilliant job of breaking down stereotypes and stigma around masturbation and genitalia, however, one little irritation for me, who as you know works in an environment which requires a high level of anatomical knowledge, more than once the narrator uses the word vagina when what they really mean is vulva or labia. When you’re touching the external parts of the genitals, it’s your vulva – not your vagina, which is internal, pedantic, yeah probably!

It’s not cheap, at £20 ($29), which will exclude some from the experience, and the site is age restricted to 18s and over, which seems a bit of a shame, given that young people are bombarded with online pornography and are, arguably, some of those most in need of frank, helpful information about taking control of their own sexuality and sexual pleasure.

As I've suggested, I think it's fabulous that society is becoming much more open about our sexuality however, I look forward to the day when the idea that we need a website to “demystify” female pleasure will seem as strange and outdated as the old myth about masturbation leading to blindness! Hopefully OMGYes, as well as other conversation changers like it, will help to herald an age of openness that will eventually render such technology unnecessary – in the same way that a similar site about male pleasure would seem largely redundant.

What's on this week?