What on earth is a Yoni and why does it need de-armouring!

I was worried about my own vagina. It needed a context of other vaginas, a community, a culture of vaginas. There’s so much darkness and secrecy surrounding them like the Bermuda Triangle.

Eve Ensler

Ladies, it’s time we have a serious chat...with our vaginas. Vajayjay, pussy, muff, quim, foof — whatever name you wish to lovingly give it, have you checked in on it lately?

And no, I’m not talking about a gyno appointment or pap smear. I mean really checked in: asked if it’s happy or sad? Tense or soft? Open or closed? Sensitive or numb?

Before you roll your eyes or shirk away from the awkwardness of it all, think about it: when it comes to men, the symptoms of an unhappy penis are obvious (blue balls, erectile dysfunction or early ejaculation). But what about female genitalia? How do we know if our vagina is truly getting the care it needs?

Despite being more empowered than ever, recent studies suggest we’re still just as sexually unsatisfied as ever. Currently, only seven out of ten women orgasm during sex (compared to nine out of 10 men) according to recent a Lovehoney survey. Add to that the fact that we’re barely getting what we want when we do have sex – the latest Journal of Sexual Research study found men and women desire at least 20 minutes of foreplay, yet in reality we’re only getting half of that.

Which is why there’s no point “beating around the bush” any longer... or is there? Perhaps that’s EXACTLY what we need to be doing ...literally.

Yoni de-armouring is an age-old technique that has recently made a comeback thanks to the rise of the sex therapists and female empowerment circles seeking improved sexual satisfaction, and wanting to reclaim the sacred power of the yoni.

But what is ‘yoni de-armouring’ and how does it work exactly?

Leela Kalyani of Padmini Yoni, a yoni de-armouring healer, explains that; “Firstly, the word yoni is a Sanskrit term that translates to 'sacred temple' and refers to a woman's sexual organs. In Tantra it’s said that this space is the most receptive part of a woman’s body and that we hold a huge amount of energy there, including stressful or traumatic experiences.”

“So a yoni massage supports women in healing their sexuality, clearing their yoni of past experiences, releasing pelvic tension and ultimately allows them to tap into their power and pleasure potential.”

Which is where the ‘de-armouring’ part comes in. “Body armour is essentially where the body contracts as a result of stress, trauma or pain on an emotional, energetic or energetic level,” says Kalyani.

She continues, saying “While body armour can appear anywhere, I focus on de-armouring the heart, womb and yoni which often will look like internal/vaginal trigger point release, softening tension and releasing stress through touch and energy work.”

How can you tell if your yoni is holding trauma or tension?

According to my new sex guru Leela, the symptoms are incredibly diverse, but the most obvious manifest as “a sense of numbness around the vulva and in the vagina, pain during intercourse or intimacy, feeling energetically blocked in that region, PMS symptoms, lack of libido, fertility issues, trauma as a result of sexual assault or an inability to express boundaries and communicate your truth.”

Leela believes most women hold a degree of armouring as a result of our cultural climate.

“I believe most women have a level of genital armouring that prevents them from experiencing their orgasmic potential because we are still carrying the imprints of guilt, shame and fear so deeply embedded in our cultural conditioning around sexuality,”.

This embedded sense of shame is something that leading sexologist Juliet Allen believes many enlightened women are finally starting to reclaim.

“There's definitely more awareness around the importance of tapping into sexual power now, with yoni de-armouring becoming much more known in the Western world, which is awesome!” says Juliet. “People are finally understanding that sexual health is just as important as any other area of our health and that sexual healing is a must if we are to be whole, healthy humans.”

Which is why, Leela believes all women can all benefit from having a deeper connection to their yonis, through yoni massage.

“In my experience clearing armour has allowed me to feel safe and anchored in my body again and by deepening my relationship with it, I can now listen to the wisdom of my body and experience a life of freedom and pleasure and be of service to other women to help them do the same.”

As a sexologist, Juliet too has had incredibly healing and positive experiences as a result of yoni de-armouring. “Yoni de-armouring when done right (or with a credible practitioner) can be extremely healing”. “I have had beautiful experiences with both female and male practitioners —with my most recent session allowing me to let go of heaviness and pain that I had been holding onto from an ectopic pregnancy.”

Freaked out by the idea of someone else touching you down there? Good news — for those not keen on a practitioner-led massage, you can benefit equally from your own touch through self-practise. It’s as simple as stocking up on coconut oil and exploring your “sacred temple.”

“I recommend using organic coconut oil and only entering the yoni when you feel open and ready,” says Juliet. “As the yoni and womb stores a lot of emotion and trauma (and is super sensitive), so it’s important to go gently with yourself the way you would expect lovers to go gently and lovingly with you”.

Want to know more, especially around the practical/physical elements of this – because I know what some of you are thinking – I found THIS website really interesting and THIS YouTube video, really informative!

What’s on this week?